So there I was, happily standing slightly left of middle, when people around me started doing weird stuff. First, it was making statements that bothered me. Stuff like calling me a TERF (trans exclusionary radical feminist), which is so far from the mark as to be almost funny. I was told that I don’t understand what it’s like to be LGBTetc. I just can’t possibly get it because I’m so normal.
Folks, these things were coming from people who’ve known me in real life, face to face, for about a decade. They know I’m pansexual (ie bisexual but really I don’t care what you stash in your slacks). They know I’m pagan. They know I’m poly. They know I’m kinky. They know I’ve had lovers of many types (men, women, and people who don’t really fit comfortably into either of the first two categories). They know I come from Hungarian stock (ie Magyar, a group who were and sometimes still are persecuted) on one side, and Scottish (a group historically persecuted) on the other. If you want to get down to brass tacks, I’m a charter member of some of those alphabet soup groups. I’m old enough that I remember when the kink community was still ruled largely by the gay men and their families.
I’m also apparently sexist, homophobic, and racist.
All of this is said of me because I decided to comment (sometimes face to face, and sometimes online) about things going on in the world. Stuff like how I don’t think you should force the word “cis” on someone, just like you (that particular group) don’t want various pronouns forced on you. Somehow, it’s always “just not the same.” And so I’m a traitor to my race, to my gender, to my country.
What?
When I was talking with Chris about it the other day, I said it was like I was standing on a beach, in the water up to my waist, happily between the ocean and the shore. I was able to reach both, and glad to be there. Then suddenly the water sucked away, and I was on dry beach, confused and unsure. Then a bunch of rednecks and republicans walked by and welcomed me to the Right, and I got more confused.
What?
There’s actually a bunch of us on TikTok, people who used to be more left leaning, or at least centrist, who’ve now found out that we’re the new Right. To be honest, none of us really wanted to be here, but here we are, and we’re trying to make the best of it. And there’s no denying it. When the tide of the Left receded, we were left behind to flounder in our new-found home.
The good part is that most of the people over here seem to be really nice. The few dipshits are easy to ignore, and amazingly, no one else gets upset when you ignore the dipshits. The bad part is that some of what’s important to us (a certain level of abortion access, marijuana decriminalization and legalization, the government either allowing all marriages or getting out of the marriage business altogether, etc) seems to be really ignored or put down over here.
Something that seems to bother us but not other Right leaning people, is that there are some important people over here (governors, members of the House and Senate, etc) who are completely bonkers. I’m hearing from other people in the House** (though I cannot find any video of it, which upsets me) that Marjorie Taylor Greene took her personal theories about the government controlling the weather, and made it the business of the House. She’s welcome to believe what she wants, but that kind of nonsense doesn’t belong in the House chambers.
First, how do y’all navigate this kind of stuff? I know that Greene and others say good stuff too, but when they start taking to official places with these kinds of kooky claims, what are you supposed to do? I don’t want that kind of thing associated with me. And now, suddenly and without my real consent, they are associated with me. Because I’m somehow on the Right. I don’t like it. It bothers me. I don’t want to share anything with people who think 9/11 was an inside job, the Holocaust was not real, or that the government is purposefully causing hurricanes to devastate southern states.
Second, I’m so, so sorry to all of you. Four years ago, when I was down on Trump, I was “drinking the kool-aid” as the saying goes. I couldn’t see past the news clips and misinformation. Now, I’m standing over here, looking at people who were friends of mine a couple of years ago, and I’m aghast. They can’t see the nose in front of their face. What the actual fuck? But I can’t say anything, because they won’t hear it anymore than I heard it when I was over there. I keep wanting to pull up all the data and wave it around and yell, “See? See how right this is?” but I know it won’t do any good at all.
I’m sorry I was one of those people. I don’t know how y’all dealt with me. I don’t know how I could have been so stupid. I pride myself on working hard at seeing all sides of any particular issue, and to have missed such glaring problems on the side I was then standing on… I feel horrible.
I’m watching the civilian led search and rescue operations like the United Cajun Navy, Shepherd’s Purse, and other organizations, doing just what needs doing. I saw FEMA not arriving until far too late. Don’t get me wrong, there are FEMA people who are doing their best to do the right thing, and I appreciate that. There are some parts of FEMA that are doing infrastructure, and doing it well (I have heard good things about the folks from FEMA around Ashville, for instance). The military is finally on site (and it is not their fault they weren’t on site earlier… they were ready and willing but didn’t have orders), doing what needs doing. There’s people all over, just doing the right things, and I applaud that. I am trying to be as balanced and investigative and fact-based as I can about the outcome of these storms, despite being worried about friends and family in the areas affected.
Anyhow, I just wanted you to know how sorry I am for being clueless for so long. I’m trying. I’m working at it.
** I did find the original video that led me to investigate, and the representative is Jeff Jackson of NC. Though he’s a Dem, I like his style of explaining things. I’ve seen him take people on “his side” to task when they’ve been wrong, and he’s relatively polite when taking down people on the Right. Here’s the TikTok video:
@jeffjacksonnc Rep. Jeff Jackson: Update on Helene disaster response. #fyp #nc #wnc #helene #northcarolina #asheville #boone #blowingrock ♬ original sound – Jeff Jackson
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