Servers and Tips
A (Right leaning) friend posted this image on FB yesterday. I decided to comment:So I generally tip between 10% and 15%, unless a) it’s around a holiday, or b) the service was exceptional (which happens a LOT, I might add). I do so because I want to. If someone attempted to make it mandated, I’d stop eating out.
That bottom part (of the very AI picture *sigh*) where it says “It’s not my job to serve you for free!”… They get paid. Servers get paid. Now, I *personally* don’t think they get paid enough, and that we should be paying servers the same wage we pay any person doing a high skill but low training job (meaning you don’t need to incur a university cost or college cost to become a server, but recognizing the personal effort required to become skillful as a server).
Again, my opinion (not fact) is that $7.25 (NH’s minimum wage) is not a decent wage for servers, at least those working as a server full time. School kids working part time and those who are brand new have not yet developed the skills, and their pay should reflect that. Or rather, those who’ve put the time and effort into becoming good at their chosen career or job should be rewarded for doing so.
Currently, NH law says this: “A tipped employee of a restaurant, hotel, motel, inn or cabin who customarily and regularly receives more than $30 a month in tips directly from the customer will receive a base rate from the employer of not less than 45 percent of the applicable minimum wage.” (https://www.dol.nh.gov/inspections/wage-and-hour/minimum-wage)
Indeed said, “The average salary for a server is $19.53 per hour in New Hampshire and $100.00 tips per day.584 salaries taken from job postings on Indeed in the past 36 months (updated June 8, 2026).” (https://www.indeed.com/career/server/salaries/NH)
I know averages sort of bork our understanding of what most servers ACTUALLY make, but that does seem to match what I’m hearing from people in my area (Jaffrey/Rindge/Peterborough NH and Gardner/Westminster/Leominster MA, none of which are “high income” areas) who are working as servers.
If someone is making the equivalent of $19 an hour, they are most definitely not working for free. Implying that they are doing so is disingenuous, and morally corrupt. Now, if there is someone who is not making enough to survive, then that definitely needs to be addressed.
I’ll tell you what I’ve personally witnessed in the past couple of years, though. This will be unpopular (and frankly, I don’t care). I’ve seen people become servers because “they couldn’t find anything else” (quotes because it’s what I’ve directly heard, not because I’m being sarcastic), and they do a poor job. They don’t seem to be attempting to get better at it, learn techniques to improve on their service, etc. They just want to complain that people at the restaurant don’t tip enough, or are rude.
I, myself, have been called rude and unruly because I pointed out that a hot dish I ordered arrived stone cold (like, not even warm, never mind hot), and that I had asked for that burger to be cooked medium and it was a hockey puck. I didn’t say so rudely, I simply asked the waitress to take it back to the kitchen and ask the cook staff to fix the problem. She got snarky, waved her hands in my face, called me some four letter words, and basically slammed dishes on the table the rest of that visit. Here’s the thing… I would not return to that restaurant until that server was gone. She ruined a meal. I wasn’t blaming her for the food; I simply wanted a hot burger cooked correctly. I was polite; she wasn’t. And that seems to be a theme, the past couple of years. No, I’m not tipping that kind of service, and I am going to be talking to the manager about it. A couple of times when food was excellent but service horrendous, I have asked a manager to give the tip to the chef(s) and not the server.
The fourth week of May is always a pleasant one for me. I abandon the modern world, pack up all my 18th century clothes, and head up to the 
During the time between Friday (May 22) and Wednesday (May 26), there’s a thing going on in our lower field called The Original Rendezvous. It attracts about 150 or so people, all depicting folks from the 1720s through the 1820s. They have contests for the most historically accurate set-up, cribbage tournaments, bragging contests, an amazing potluck, and so much more. I baked 18 loaves of bread on the Saturday afternoon, which was a ton of work but fairly amazing. I went and sold those loaves for $4 a loaf, and the Rendezvous folks came running to buy. Some remembered me from last year, and were ripping into their loaves the second they got them! Such an amazing feeling, feeding so many people and celebrating the trade that would have happened between travelers stopped at the Fort.
Of course, now that I’m home, there’s even more laundry to do. Not only am I washing all the things I wore, but also my bed things, my covers (for draping over historically inaccurate Rubbermaid tubs, for instance), and the modern clothing I’d had with me for my dinner out with a friend, and for sleeping in. Yes, in the 18th century, people slept in their shifts. No, I generally don’t, because 18th century people also dealt with a lot of bodily fluids, smells, and other stuff that my modern feelings can’t deal with. That and the idea of a spider getting into my kit while I’m asleep just skeeves me out. LOL! So I have modern sleeping things. I also use underwear, which they did not (at least nothing like we have today), and I’m thankful for that modern underthing which makes my life so much better.
Chris also joined me at the fort, which was fun. He now has more accurate pants and a good hat, and I’m working on his vest and shirt. After that, it’ll be moccasins for his feet. Yes, I’m standing on a high step and I’m still shorter than him in the photo. I’m short. He spent his time in the joinery, working on a bench for use at the Fort. We have some slabs with raw sides, leftovers from his work with the chainsaw sawmill, and those are being flattened and smoothed, and will get four legs put into them. Rough benches, indeed, but definitely historically accurate. He seems to be enjoying working with the hand tools, and it was fun watching him interact with the school kids who came through.
Being at the Fort let me shut down a lot of my inner squirrels. I was able to focus better, breathe deeper, and sleep well. My only issue was that the rope bed I use was badly in need of tightening. Chris and I did get it done on the Friday right before I went home, and we took in over a foot of slack in the ropes! The entire bed is much more solid, and I can’t wait until I get the chance to sleep in it again.
