Allyson

Found on the book of faces:

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… but not as you usually hear it.

Sorry this is kind of short, but I’m pinch hitting for Chris tonight. He’s having network issues and so asked me to share a Tuesday tunes with you guys. This is a group/person that I have been listening to for a while and she does what’s called Bard core music. She takes modern tunes and turns them into medieval ones. I adore them and think they’re hysterical and usually really good. And this is the one that I was listening to when he asked me to post for him and so I am sharing with you. I hope you enjoy!

I realize not everyone likes tofu, but let’s face facts: it’s cheap, it’s relatively healthy, and you can cook it in a zillion different ways. I’m in the process of learning how to use it for more meals, and so I’m going to share some of those recipes (the good ones) with you. This one in particular was so yummy that even my tofu-hater was willing to have it again!

Ingredients:

• block firm tofu, drained
• ¼ cup soy sauce
• 1 tbsp dark brown sugar*
• 2 tbsp unseasoned rice vinegar
• 1 tsp toasted sesame oil
• 1 tsp red pepper flakes
• 1 tsp fish sauce (optional)
• 2 tbsp cooking oil
• 1 tbsp ginger, minced
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• lime juice, for seasoning
• wraps or pitas, for stuffing

Start by wrapping up your tofu in a lint free towel or cheesecloth, and putting it onto a cutting board. Place a cast iron skillet or a baking sheet weighed down with something heavy on top on top of the tofu, and let it drain for at least 15 minutes, or as long as 45 minutes. Don’t skip this, as it helps with the texture of the tofu.

Crumble the pressed tofu into a bowl using your fingers. You want small pieces, with none larger than a pea.

In a separate bowl, whisk together the soy sauce, sugar (*you can use Splenda brown sugar blend or any other sweetener you prefer if you don’t like the regular stuff), vinegar, sesame oil, red pepper, and fish sauce (or if you don’t like fish sauce, you may sub in Worcestershire sauce or mushroom ketchup for umami). The sugar may not fully dissolve, and that’s okay. It will once you begin heating it later in the recipe. Do your best!

In a large cast iron skillet or other nonstick pan, heat the cooking oil over a medium high heat. Add in the tofu, shake it to make an even single layer, and let it cook without stirring until it crisps up and is deep golden brown on the bottom. This can take 5 to 7 minutes. It’s okay to peek to see how it’s doing, but don’t stir it up until it forms that crispy bottom. Once it’s crisp, stir it up (breaking it up if necessary), and try to flip over the pieces to crisp the other side. You want the entire batch of tofu to be crispy, which requires you to let it sit and cook in the oil. It shouldn’t take too long, though.

Once the tofu is crispy, add in the ginger and garlic and stir gently until fragrant. This should take a minute or less. Add in the soy mixture, and continue to cook until the liquid essentially evaporates. This may take up to 10 minutes, but more likely will only take 5 minutes or so.

Spoon the tofu into the wraps or pitas, and add any garnishes you like (such as cilantro leaves, shredded lettuce, tomato, hot sauce, etc.). Top with a light squeeze of lime, then serve.

Notes:

The spicy hot mixes so well with the sweet in this! Too often, tofu is served squishy, and this avoids that problem. If you find that you can’t get a good crisp on the tofu crumbles, you can try dusting it all with a teaspoon or so of cornstarch and then just hand mixing it lightly before frying it. The cornstarch helps it crisp, but also adds to the calories, so avoid it if you can.

I don’t know if this is really a “prepping” thing, but it’s situational awareness and so I’m calling it prepping today.

Number One Rule: an armed female is a safe female. I believe with all the breath in my body that if every women carried a firearm and was well trained in its use and care, that sexual assaults would nigh on disappear. SA’ers are sorry, loser types who can’t handle real women, and coming face to face with a firearm would make the worm between their legs crawl away in horror. I continually and constantly encourage my women friends to go out, get trained, and pick a quality firearm that they can carry… and then to carry it always. I also believe that safely arming women is the best way to combat the woke shit going on right now, because while the Constitution says we’re equal, Sam Colt guarantees it.

Number Two Rule: people who sexually assault others have declared themselves dog meat, and will be treated as such. I’m not a “dog person” but if the SHTF for real, I’d be picking myself up a good quality mastiff or bulldog, and you can bet your ass I’d be sicking it on anyone who I caught doing such things (or had incontrovertible truth that they had done such things). If I catch you SA’ing someone, I will fuck you up. No, like really. I’m not good with firearms, but I’m hella good with a cast iron frying pan, and I own a ton of them. I catch you, I’ll start with your head, but I’ll end with your balls.

Number Three Rule: women (or anyone, honestly) who lie about sexual assault have proven themselves to no longer be human. And I mean that. I don’t want liars to be prosecuted for lying. I don’t want them to be prosecuted as if they had committed the assault. I want them to be executed. I am strongly of the opinion that the most dangerous thing to women out there is another woman who lies about sexual assault, because it increases the danger for ALL of us. Men and women alike.

So why are you talking about sexual assault today, Allyson?

There are several people in the ren faire community who have been accused of sexual assault. They’re all men, by the by, not that it matters. I’ve met a woman who sexually assaulted men, and I saw her in exactly the same way I saw the males. She was a cretin and she should have been burned at the stake. But I digress… These people come in three categories: known SA’ers, suspected SA’ers, and people who’ve been falsely accused or accused with no credible facts to back it up.

One of the women who had been sexually assaulted three times by different men recently spoke up in the RF community. She chose to post a picture of one of her assaulters and make the post public. And this is where we get a bit dicey. See, perp numbers one and two HAD assaulted her. She went to the police, took them to court, and they were jailed or fined or whatever, and were legally labeled assaulter. All fine and dandy. Perp number three, the one she posted the picture of? She’s “chosen” not to go to the police. And that makes me concerned.

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I’ve seen a couple of videos of DC police (or at least people dressed as police well enough that they appear real to me) challenging people sitting on their own porches, asking for ID and demanding their questions be answered. This is, in my VERY strong opinion, not good. Unless those people are having a rave and offering the cops illegal drugs, or are smashing in windows or beating their wife and kids in front of the cops, the cops should not be bothering them. We’re protected against unreasonable search and/or seizure.

It’s easy to blame this on Trump. That’s what the Left is doing. “Oh look, Trump has weaponized the National Guard!” First and foremost, Trump has not “weaponized” anything other than maybe his ability to tweak leftists. Second, the DC Nat’l Guard is different from the States’ Nat’l Guard. It is the only branch of the NG that directly reports to the President. That’s for good reason. In other words, the Nat’l Guard was already under the President’s control. It wasn’t “wrested away” from the Mayor; she never had control of it to begin with.

But let’s go back to the police and/or NG who are roaming DC’s streets and harassing people on their porches. That is illegal, and those who are bothering people doing nothing suspicious beyond filming the authorities should be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. I believe that what they’re doing is a form of malicious compliance. I’ve only seen a handful of videos showing authorities badgering people doing nothing wrong, and while the cops in the videos are being excessively polite, they’re making statements I consider to be stupid. They’re asking to see ID, and proof that people live in the homes which they’re sitting in front of. Last I checked, you don’t have to prove that kind of thing. I believe that there are a handful of angry authorities out there, leftist holdouts or whatever, who are not interested in making DC safer. I believe they’re interested in making a scene on camera to make the whole of the NG operation look bad.

The term malicious compliance means that the letter of the law is being followed, to the detriment of the spirit of the law.  Sometimes, this is done because a boss is telling you to do something stupid, and you’ve made several attempts to correct that boss, to no avail. So you follow the boss’s instructions exactly, enabling you to show that you’ve done only what you were told to do, and nothing else. Generally, it can be a good method to winnow out bosses who really don’t understand how to utilize good employees as it’s non-violent and generally not overly harmful. In the hands of leftists in DC, however, it could (and I believe will) undermine what Trump is trying to do.

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Everyone who wants to survive upcoming emergencies (long or short) needs to have a skills tree. This is a list of skills that are in your household, as well as any that are overlapped. All good prepper families have lots of overlap, because we know that if one person succumbs (to a virus, to a gunshot wound, to dropping a tree on themselves…), someone else has to take up the slack. When you make your skills tree, be sure to list EVERYTHING that people can do, because you never know what’s going to be needed. If you find holes, you need to figure out a way to fill them. That means bringing someone into your plans, training yourself or someone else up in the missing skill, or figuring out ways to not need it. But plans need to be made.

Basic Skills

These are skills everyone should know. If someone in your group doesn’t know these, educate them, and fast.

• cooking over a fire
• gardening (basic, ie you can identify a pea and know how to operate a watering can, etc)
• sewing (basic, ie you can sew on a button or patch something roughly)
• triage (everyone should know how to tell how serious an injury is, even if they can’t treat it)
• shelter building
• filtering water to make it potable
• building a fire
• basic first aid (specifically, treating gunshot wounds, burns, and breaks, because they’re the most likely injuries you’ll encounter)
• self defence (pick your weapon)
• basic strategy
• how to wash clothes with no power
• where to find basic vitamins (ie you can drink pine needle tea to get Vitamin C)
• how to find dry firewood
• how to go to the bathroom when you have no indoor plumbing
• how to care for a newborn and its mother
• how to read maps (both standard ones and topographical)
• how to use a compass
• general problem solving/logic skills
• record keeping (write down what you do and how it’s done, for future generations)

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There are all sorts of old timey skills that are useful in a SHTF scenario, but knowing how to bake bread will be high on the list. At one time in history (ie anytime prior to 1930), pretty much everyone had at least a vague idea of how to bake bread. If they hadn’t done it themselves, they at least had witnessed it being made. The modern grocery store killed the last of the bakers, though. Baking, even the “bougie” artisan stuff, is done largely by machine these days. Why bake when you can just pick up a couple of loaves at the store? And store loaves last for weeks and weeks, while fresh bread goes moldy after only a few days.

When you have access to store bought bread, that’s fine. But what if you don’t? What if … oh, say a pandemic happens, and all the grocery stores are out of EVERYTHING, and you can’t find store bread? The bottom line is you need to know how to make your own.

There are simple loaves, no knead recipes that come together quickly with a minimum of mess. There are complex loaves that require multiple rises and tons of work. I tend to go for bread somewhere in the middle. Two rises to develop the gluten and make for a lovely, crusty bread that will hold together as sandwich exterior. A nice mix of flours. Standard yeast. It’s not a difficult loaf, if you know how to bake.

On Sunday, I held a class for six people at the Fort at No. 4, where I taught them how to make bread. From scratch. In a wood fired bake oven. We had a real range of students. One was a reenactor from the current iteration of Roger’s Rangers, who simply hadn’t learned to bake in the beehive and really wanted some help. One was a complete bread virgin but the price was right and how exciting to get to hang out in a fort and cook bread? The two couples were doing the lessons as a sort of “date day” thing, and were at varying levels of having attempted bread. One of the guys was a baker at a big company, but had never made bread with nothing more than a wooden spoon and a bowl.

We started out the day by adding yeast to warm water, and feeding it a bit of sugar. I explained that we were fermenting the yeast, letting it become active. While it isn’t necessary with dry active yeast (which is what we were using), it’s a good habit to get into. While our yeast was waking up, we went out to start the fire in the beehive oven. Everyone brought some wood, and I had already split kindling and had scraps from Chris’s day in the workshop on Saturday, so the fire started up quickly. Once it was loaded up and roaring, we were off to the kitchen again.

We slowly added our flour into the water and yeast mixture, then stirred with a wooden spoon. Once we had most of the flour in and the dough was forming, it got turned out onto the table, and we started the kneading process. Everyone has sore shoulders this morning (except me), because when kneading entirely by hand, it takes about 20 minutes. They all had various problems with their dough as we kneaded, and I was able to explain a variety of possible failure points. Everyone ended up with a decent “silky smooth” ball of dough, and we set that to rest.

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We’re leaving the 15th century behind, at this point, and moving boldly into the 18th! This recipe comes from The Compleat Housewife, written by Eliza Smith in England in 1773. Today’s recipe is entitled, “To boil Fowls and Cabbage” and is another forced meat yumminess!

Ingredients:

• a well shaped cabbage
• savory forced meat
• 2 eggs
• 2 whole chickens, cooked
• “some” melted butter
• slices of bacon

Pick yourself a nice, sizable cabbage, peel off a few of the outer leaves until it looks clean and good, and then use a sharp knife to cut off the top (like a lid), then cut out the inside of it. You want to form a cavity, in which you can put your meat, but it doesn’t have to be anything special. Set aside the removed bits of cabbage to stew up as a side dish.

Mix together “savory forced meat” (generally this means any ground meat mixed well with spices that you like, and I use a nice chub of country ground sausage meat) with two whisked eggs, so that it’s well distributed. Put the meat and egg mix into the hole in the cabbage, then put the “lid” back on. Wrap the stuffed cabbage with a cloth (cheesecloth or even a tea towel tied in place with kitchen string works well), and lower it into a large pot of lightly salted boiling water. Boil until the exterior of the cabbage is tender, and the meat inside is fully cooked (anywhere from 45 minutes to 3 hours, depending on the size of your cabbage and the rate of your boil – you want the meat inside to register AT LEAST 160°F to be food safe).

While your cabbage is cooking, roast up a couple of chickens or warm up some rotisserie chicken. Place these on a large platter, and then put the stuffed cabbage (removed from its cloth prison) in between them. Over everything, place several slices of cooked bacon, and then drizzle it with some melted butter.

This makes a lovely presentation, and is quite historically accurate to the 1750s!

For those of you who live in the area, Chris and I will be up at the fort today, and I will be there tomorrow as well. He will be doing woodworking, and I am doing a project on fry bread today. Tomorrow I am teaching bread baking to a class of six. I hope to see you there!

There are a zillion books out there on various aspects of prepping, and I can’t recommend them ALL. But these are some I consider to be truly important, or they’re ones that have been recommended highly by others. I’m going to stick stuff in categories to help make it easier to look through.

SELF-SUFFICIENCY

• The Perfect Bug Out Bag
• Emergency Food Storage and Survival Guide
• Best Guide to Disaster Readiness
• SAS Survival Handbook
• The Self Sufficient Life and How to Live It

MED/FIRST AID

• SpecOps Forces Medical Handbook
• Where There is no Doctor
• PDR for Herbal Medicine
• Medicinal Plants of North America
• A Book for Midwives
• The Survival Medicine Handbook (TY Tom!)

SECURITY/SELF-DEFENSE

• 100 Deadly Skills
• Prepper’s Home Defense
• Holding Your Ground
• Navy Seal’s Bug In Guide

GENERAL SKILLS

• Encyclopedia of Country Living
• Basic Butchering of Livestock
• Shelters, Shacks, and Shanties
• Wildwood Wisdom
• No-Grid Survival Projects
• The Way Things Work (TY CBMTTek!)
• 98.6 Degrees: The Art of Keeping Your Ass Alive (TY Tom!)

CRAFTING/DIY

• The Barefoot Architect
• The Off-Grid Living Bible
• Make, Sew, and Mend
• How to Build a Moonshine Still
• Footwear Pattern Making
• How to Build Wind Turbine (etc)
• Wind Mills and Wind Motors
• Homemade Contrivances

FICTION

• Homestead Bound
• The Collapse
• One Second After
• Going Home
• Getting Out