Government Interference

We often talk about government interference. We are forced to talk about race, constantly.

Just as most gun control laws are racist in nature, designed to disarm blacks so that racist assholes could murder them, marriage license serve a similar purpose.

What is a marriage license?

In short, it is the government’s permission to perform a religious or secular ceremony declaring somebody to be your partner.

It is also a legally binding contract. At the moment you sign that contract, you have agreed to a set of laws, enforced by threat of force, on how you separate, what it costs to separate, and who will decide the access you will have to your children.

Many entities recognize that license as granting you special privileges and services.

In other words, that license is what your spouse uses to get on your insurance or for you to get on theirs. It sets the rules for custody and property. It details death benefits.

All of this in an implied contract.

Having signed that contract three times, I know what the contract implies.

How did marriage license come to be?

Before the War of Northern Aggression, the southern states had laws against blacks and whites marrying. It wasn’t allowed.

That didn’t mean that white men weren’t dipping their wick when they wanted. It didn’t mean there weren’t mixed race babies.

This didn’t bother them. If it popped out of a slave, it was a slave that would be a slave until emancipated or death. If its skin color was too dark, it was a slave until emancipated or death. Racist as hell.

I’m sure there were some “bucks” that were servicing white women, but that wasn’t acknowledged at all.

After the unCivil War, many of those racist laws were struck down. The rules against mixed marriages went away as they were rules for slaves, not laws.

So laws were passed. These laws were designed to work around certain federal restrictions on racist behavior.

The gist? To be legally married, you need to have a license from the government, granting you permission.

The requirements to get that license weren’t relevant enough, so we’ll just do that later.

Blood Tests

Ostensibly, the marriage license protected against inbreeding, transfer of STDs, and mixing of blood.

You know, that thing that got the German’s in so much hot water in the 1938-1945 time frame. Mixing races with a government designated inferior race.

The reason Los Vegas became a marriage destination wasn’t the Gambling, Food, and Shows. It was because there were no blood tests and no waiting.

You and your bride-to-be could fly into Vegas in the morning, be married by noon. Be broke by 5pm. Be on a plane back home by 7pm. Arriving with your beautiful wife to an empty airport.

But we need records!

Absolutely, we need records. Does the government require a record of your marriage? Not really.

But we want to stop people from marrying somebody else while still married!

What business is it of yours how many spouses a person has?

Well, we don’t want people defrauding insurance companies!

Sure. But is the least intrusive method?

The fact is, that before those racist laws came into existence, and the government took over record keeping, births, deaths, and marriages were recorded. They were recorded in the family bible and at the church where you married.

Those records are still trusted today. Finding a family bible with those records in them is a treasure trove for people doing genealogy.

There is no record keeping that requires government involvement.

But what about the children!

Yep, that’s an important thing. What about the children?

Bluntly, most people getting married have no idea what the contract they are signing implies. They are likely not even thinking of that.

It is the same with pre-nuptials. Why are you talking about pre-nuptials when we are about to get married? Don’t you love me? Don’t you trust me?

The needs of the children need to come first. Notice the word “need”, not “want”. If you separate, you still have a responsibility to your children.

Property

Let’s pretend you are wealthy, you’ve got an entire $1000 in your bank account. You get married in California. How much money do you have in your bank account?

The correct answer is $500. Your spouse now has $500 in your bank account.

As one cynical lawyer explained it to me, a 50/50 state is where she starts with 50 percent of everything you own, the rest of the divorce is her working to get 50 percent of what you have left.

An extreme example is during John Denver’s divorce. His wife was going to get 50% of everything he owned. He took a chainsaw to their wedding bed and cut it down the middle, giving 50% to her.

Of course the judge didn’t see it the same way, but that’s neither here, nor there.

All of these can be handled by actual, explicit contracts.

We had a constructed family a few years back. The family owned 125 acres of woodland and farm land as well as a large house, a barn, and a couple of out buildings. One part of the family put up the down payment. My lovely wife and I were putting our salaries into the homestead.

When the constructed family was destroyed, we needed to split up the household assets.

I had been stupid, I trusted and didn’t get a good contract.

The toxic person who destroyed the family had planned it that way. Her husband was responsible for the finances. Every penny she or her husband brought in went to paying down the mortgage. The money my wife and I brought in went to “maintenance” and “living expenses”. And he had records to prove all of that.

The amount of their down payment plus the total of all of their salaries was about 1/3 of the total contributes my wife and I made.

That was entirely my fault for failing to have a good contract in place.

Contracts

The legal books are awash with contract law. There are lawyers who have spent and will spend their entire career doing contract law, the last courtroom they saw was the mock court in school.

We know how to write good contracts. We know how to read contracts. We can write a contract that will cover what needs to be covered.

Do you want your spouse to have survivor benefits? Put it in the contract. Do you want child support to be 50/50? Put it in the contract. Do you want 50% of the first 5 years of your spouse’s income after you put them through school? Put it in the contract.

Is it challenging to think of all the things that should be in that contract? Yes. Are there people that can do it? YES.

Conclusion

Let’s go back to a time when marriage was a religious or secular event, and contracts were contracts.